How do I homeschool if I can’t get my kids to listen to me when I try to teach them to read, write, do a math problem, or clean up their dishes? As much as we’d all like our children to fit into neat little boxes, listen to our every word and follow that “perfect” curriculum (that I spent so much money on!) it doesn’t have to look like school (Nor will your kids want it to). Children are natural learners meaning they have their own perspective, and they learn through their own experiences. Their interests, ideas and inspiration will lead them, if you let them.

I’ve come to see our role as one of a guide and a support to help them reach their own unique goals and to create environments which facilitate learning.

Here are my tips to create an environment where you all thrive and you don’t need to necessarily, “teach”.

• Do experiments at home
• Find crafts they may enjoy
• Put out a puzzle or new book
• Drawing utensils or a mix of art materials
• An invitation to play by setting up their own toys in unique ways
• Go to a museum
• Start a garden
• Measure things
• Pull out letter blocks and try spelling words together in a fun and relaxed way

The opportunities are endless and the more engaged we are with our children the more learning we observe and the less pressure we feel. The experiences will lead to learning opportunities that you can expand upon based on what your child is interested in.

Get involved in their learning

• When they show interest in an activity find ways to be involved but not TOO involved. This is not the time to correct or “show” them how to do it. Be present and observe what they’re getting out of the activity.
• When they do ask, “how do I _____?”, “how do you spell _____?”, “Can we do this activity/experiment?” this is the time to support them in finding their answer and say, “yes!” as often as you can.

Being involved is also a great way to ease fears around technology and screen time. I have found when my children are (in my opinion) overly obsessed with a game, app or show I try to understand from their perspective. Once they’ve gotten what they need from that experience, inevitably their interest decreases and they move onto something else. My oldest (8) loves tv shows and characters. I’ll find after watching a particular show she will be inspired to draw look alike characters from the show and create her own stories about them.

Find other resources to teach them skills they WANT to learn or interests they want to expand upon

• An online class
• YouTube videos
• Apps
• Outside class
• A mentor friends/relatives/neighbors
• Books
• Magazines
• Subscription boxes
• Curriculum
• Workbooks/activity books

The more you can cater to the type of learner you have the more successful you’ll be in finding the resources they will stick with.

But what if I have to meet state standards to homeschool.

Well, you have a few choices these days. A quick google search of “umbrella schools” will help you find an online private school that can help you navigate your state laws and also enable you to homeschool in a way that fits with your family.

You don’t have to be affiliated with a school. You can sit your children down and discuss what the expectations are going to be. How can we do this homeschool thing the way we want to while complying with the law? Then go from there. Again, finding out what type of learner you have will help with making the time you do need to dedicate to “school work” more fun and engaging.

Also, if you look at the state standards for each grade and then compare it to your daily life more than likely some of it is already being covered.

Lastly, think about how you’re approaching homeschooling right now. You did enough research to conclude that you want to give your family a different life. You’re now researching how others are out there doing it. You WANT to learn more and not much is going to stop you, am I right?

When learning a new skill desirable to your child their internal drive is going to motivate them more than any external pressure. My daughter would love for me to read to her 24/7 but I’m not always available and therefore she is ready to learn on her own. She also sees it as something we value in our home, and we all enjoy it, so she wants in on the fun! My son wants to read because he sees big sister learning and his instinct is to follow her lead. Whatever the reason they will learn what they need to know, and you can facilitate that best by being a resource when they’re ready.

Don’t be afraid of the idea of “teaching”. You don’t have to teach anything. You didn’t “teach” your child to walk or talk. He or she developed the skill through their observation, developmental stage, and intrinsic motivation. These also play a role in how they learn to read, learn to use math, grasp scientific concepts, develop character, etc. We are here to parent them with unconditional love and acceptance. When they feel free to learn there is no stopping the learning from happening! What do you feel is holding you back from taking the leap into homeschool? Do you think teaching is necessary in a homeschool environment?